Just a thought...hear me out.

Rampage

Rampage

I am a fucking god.
Joined
Jan 18, 2006
Messages
2,695
Location
Wilmington, NC
I have wavered on posting this, realizing that it may be taken the wrong way. But, I decided that i would do it anyway, either out of stupidity or...whatever, here goes.

First of all, Cris Brown is wrong, immature, possibly crazy and deserves to pay dearly for what he did to Rihanna. There is no excuse for his loss of control. He should NEVER have done what he did to her.

That being said, if his home-boy had thrown his rented Lamborghini keys in the woods in a fit of anger and he had kicked HIS ass, this would be a non-story.

What's the point? Ladies...do NOT do shit to guys that would get your ass kicked if you were a dude. Not because he has the right to do it, but because of two things.

One...you tempt fate. Not every man was raised right or is mentally/emotionally stable enough to let it go. And once you do that crazy shit, you risk flipping that switch.

Second...and most important...you betray an unwritten old-school rule that more and more women are trampling on. The rule goes like this: MEN do not hit women and WOMEN avoid doing shit that would get them hit if they were men. Now not ALL women are not doing this, but there are quite a few who do.

The Rihanna/Chris Brown deal brought this discussion up with the wife and a few others and here is what I am getting from them and in response to what happened.

1) Chris Brown is crazy as hell. RUUUUUUUN!!!! He is SO in the wrong.

2) What Rihanna did was fucked up. It doesn't justify what HE did, but it was highly inappropriate and would have earned an ass-whipping if she were a man.


Now...YOUR thoughts...
 
............................................Well..........................................................

OK, it's like this, I don't support putting your hands on any woman for any reason with some exceptions:

1) Martial Arts: I let one too many females beat me to a pulp because I didn't want to fight back, after that black belt in Taekwondo roundhoused me to the head I sidekicked her to the chest....

2) Female Marines: Look, we were told that Marines are equal and as an NCO I made sure that all I saw when I looked at my Marines was Marine, no race, gender, or sexuality

Now to the serious stuff....women do lose their minds at times but men have to have the courage, backbone, and honor to walk away. I wouldn't care if my woman were She-Hulk, just walk away. Things are things and when people get angry they go after things or say things to get a rise after you. If your secure and mature enough throwing rented keys to any car would piss you off but not enough to lose control. If in 30 years your not going to care, than dont do something that could haunt you for 30 years for acting stupid.

The only thing I could ever remotely agree with is grabbing and holding your girl to stop her from knocking you out or hurting herself with maybe some shaking and loud speak, but walking away is best. If you are with a crazy woman, hitting her wont change her being crazy, it will just get you locked up and she will still be crazy.

Having been punched in the face several times by an ex-wife and just walking away with my temper at that time proves that it's possible to have discipline.
 
REAL MEN DON'T HIT WOMEN! It's just that simple!

Chris Brown was OUT OF ORDER. That PUNK needs to be black balled, put in jail and shown how it feels to be HIT to the point of having to go to the hospital.

Now at the same time, I DON'T agree with women who try to fight men for NO REASON. its ONE thing if you have to protect yourself from a man who is trying to FORCE himself upon you or is trying to ABUSE YOU, but if a woman feels like SHE has to hit a man then she is just as volatile and unstable.

Domestic Violence is a serious problem...and maybe if it was treated like a SERIOUS CRIME and people were getting slapped with MANDATORY jail time and FELONY charges they'd wake up.

There's nothing any man can say to me to justify their hitting a woman. NOTHING.

And I also have little regard for me who claim to be "Former batterers"...YEAH RIGHT. that's like a convicted SEX OFFENDER saying "i dont do that anymore". once you cross that line, that prooves its in you...and that you did it once (or more)...and you'll do it again. its just a matter of time.

men who batter women should be put on a LIST just like sex offenders...THAT would be a sure fire way to start CHANGING the tide of the fight against domestic violence.
 
my personal thing is that a man should never hit a woman unless shes coming at him with lethal force. Its a complete different thing when all of the sudden a knife comes into play after an argument (learned that lesson from a friend of mine).
 
Nice thread Garrick! :xyxthumbs:

One of my co-workers and I were also discussing this same situation at work today. She feels that Chris was provoked by Rihanna and therefore lashed out at her.

In these type of situations it's difficult to say what really did happen. There are so many "rumors" whether on blogs, the news, or even television. So facts can and will be twisting. The only two people who know what went down are the two of them.

However, I agree that men shouldn't hit women either unless they have a valid reason to! This would be self-defense (such as a woman's carrying a weapon or threatening a man's life), protecting a loved one which could fall under self-defense, or perhaps an unstable disorder like bi-polar. Obviously, nobody should be hitting or attacking anyone especially after such a trivial thing as tossing out car keys (if that's the case). But maybe Rihanna had her reasons for tossing them like Chris being too intoxicated to drive. If it was a result from a fight then yes that is immature.

I don't believe men have the right to hit a woman unless the reasons mentioned above. Women tend to be smaller and some are more frail than others. But it can be said equally for men who are victims of domestic abuse by their wife or loved ones. Violence in these kind of situations is not okay no matter who started it. Both men and women have tempers but it really comes down to self control.
 
I have a revelation for you, Farrah: it's in ALL of us. Some of us do it and some do not. But can ANY man be provoked to the point of CONSIDERING beating someone's ass, regardless of gender? Yep.

The point I was making is that we have come to a point in our society where doing this comes to light more, it is more effectively prosecuted than ever, and women enjoy (in many states) additional protections in these situations. It is not perfect, not even close. But I already see some women unscrupulously using the changes to their advantage, saying and doing things that they wouldn't THINK of doing a generation ago to men. This to me is asking for trouble, regardless of who is right or wrong.

For an example, Farrah, you have the right own your own stuff and not have it taken from you. But we both know that if you go to Cabrini Green at night and walk into an apartment while leaving your car running that you are not making a wise choice. The point is not necessarily who is right and wrong:my point was that this situation is a cautionary tale in that what Rihanna did was wrong and WAAAY out of bounds. It does not excuse CBs behavior but it makes the response less surprising to me. A 19 year old male in the car of his dreams, and you just screwed it up after arguing with him, and he has a past of domestic violence in his family, as has been reported? Not smart.

I hope they both get help and get well. 19 years old is too young to have your entire life screwed up.
 
Wait, so Rihanna threw Chris Brown's rented car keys into the woods because she was pissed....and that gives him the right to beat her ass to a pulp? Unless i'm missing something [I haven't heard any recent updates about it] I don't see how any sane human being could look at that situation and say 'hmm....she pissed him off, you never mess with a guys car or you'll get beat'. Please, that's neanderthalic.

The ONLY time a man should lay his hands on a woman is if the woman is coming after him with a deadly weapon. There are no other excuses. No amount of shit a woman can say or do should 'drive' a man to kick her ass. It's unacceptable in my opinion. If a man is fed up with the woman, LEAVE. Tell her to fuck off and go about your own buisness. That alone differentiates a real man from a piece of shit little boy.
 
"women are TRYING things with men they wouldnt have generations ago?" well garrick sounds like you would have THRIVED in the 50's when it was socially acceptable for a man to PUMMEL a woman for something as simple as being late for dinner! :rolleyes: chris brown's childhood doesnt give him a free pass & he basically assaulted her OVER A CAR! HOW is she at ALL to blame for that? & youre right : i'm one of TODAY'S women who DONT live in FEAR of men nor will i take their shit! ;) & AMEN! @ sammi's post.
 
OK, let's try this again. CB was totally wrong. No doubt about that. What I was venturing is that what Rihanna did was unwise. It was not deserving of ANY of what CB did..no doubt...but it exposed her to a situation in which she had to depend on the convention that men should not hit women. It did not work for her in this case. That does not make her to blame for him doing that, it was beyond the pale. But her actions guaranteed that the situation they had would escalate with no way to get away from each other. Unwise.

Ask any of your male friends. if a guy was in their car and arguing with them in their car, then took their keys and threw them away where they could not be found...that is an understandable asswhippin' offense. Man to man.

I am not asking for the 50s, and I would not have thrived (Black, remember? LOL). I am simply saying that I would say to ANY woman, do not place yourselves in such a vulnerable position. Don't bow and step to a man, but it is wise to be mindful of who you are with and the situation. She escalated an unhealthy situation and while he MAY have attacked her regardless, it does not escape me that it is possible that he would NOT have. Just sayin'.
 
I understand what you're saying Garrick, but to me it sounds completely ridiculous for someone to get THAT pissed off because another person threw car keys into the woods. :rolleyes:

But to say that woman need to watch what situations they put themselves in because it could possibly mean them getting beat up out of anger is outragous. Why should we have to shelter our anger or shut our mouths 'just incase' we say or do something that pisses off a man? That's complete and utter crap. Shitty childhood or not. Anger issues or not. Mental problems or not. Woman shouldn't have to walk on egg shells simply because there are men out there who don't know how to walk away.
 
Persephone said:
I understand what you're saying Garrick, but to me it sounds completely ridiculous for someone to get THAT pissed off because another person threw car keys into the woods. :rolleyes:
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OKAY!? there's NO justification. and SO WHAT "if it had been a man that threw the keys"...it WASNT a man...and even if it HAD been, if Chris Brown attacked ANYONE over that, then it would still be the same thing: he's bat shit out of control and needs to go to jail (among other things). the fact that he PUMMELED a woman, his GIRLFRIEND over a CAR just makes it even worse.


But to say that woman need to watch what situations they put themselves in because it could possibly mean them getting beat up out of anger is outragous. Why should we have to shelter our anger or shut our mouths 'just incase' we say or do something that pisses off a man? That's complete and utter crap. Shitty childhood or not. Anger issues or not. Mental problems or not. Woman shouldn't have to walk on egg shells simply because there are men out there who don't know how to walk away.
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see, that's why i said Garrick's statement sounds like a throwback to the 1950's mentality!

"oh she got hit because she MOUTHED OFF" etc.

Chris saw his mother being abused. SHAME on his father and all that means is that Chris HIMSELF was at risk for becoming an abuser HIMSELF and guess what? there he is now. A person might have "sympathy" for his traumatic childhood but he's gone from being the victim to the predator so there's NO sympathy for him now. I can't BELIEVE how people are suddenly starting to think he "might be justified for what he did"....see...THIS is why i stay single.

I wish a man WOULD try that with me. I'd go to JAIL because i'd KILL HIM. BELIEVE THAT! :fdevil:
 
Why is it that some people Rihanna escalated it by tossing his keys? I heard that Chris was trying to hook up with Paris Hilton (I don't know why!) and that's what started the argument.

Women have the same liberties as men do. Even messing with a man's belongings does not give him the right to attack her. So I agree with Sam and Farrah here.

THIS is why i stay single.
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Girl you stay single because no man can handle your ass! :hehe2:

I wish a man WOULD try that with me. I'd go to JAIL because i'd KILL HIM. BELIEVE THAT!
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Or your car! ;)

I can understand what Garrick is saying about personal belongings but does that stand equally if a man is getting smart with a woman? Is it okay for a woman to beat the hell out of a man if he's out of line?
 
This is why I started not to say anything at all. We ALL agree tht CB was wrong for what he did, and we all also agree that Rihanna should not have had to suffer that for what she did. Agreed? GOOD.

But there is a WIDE chasm between "walking on eggshells" and deciding not to cripple the use of a quarter-million dollar RENTED car. This is not throwing the keys to my Jetta in the woods, although I would be about as pissed as I could remember if someone did that. I could kick a man's ass for that, and though I would NEVER hit her, my wife would KNOW not to do that.

I think we can have this discussion as adults without pretending that what she did was NOTHING. I am saying that while it was no justification for what he did, it was fucked up.

I did not say that women should walk on eggshells lest they get hit by a man. I DID say that it is unwise to do something as woman to a man that a man would hit another man for. That bar is actually rather high, not eggshells at all. Trust me, if Rihanna could turn back time and not toss those damn keys, she would. It ain't cool to be hurt and be RIGHT.

And Heather, women ALREADY assume a double standard for hitting men who mouth off.

Women have the same liberties as men do. Even messing with a man's belongings does not give him the right to attack her.
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Actually, that statement assumes a GREATER level of liberties than men enjoy. If I threw my co-worker's keys in the woods during an argument (which would require probably snatching them from him, which I suspect she did), and he kicked my ass in a fight, I would have very little recourse. The judge would likely consider it MUTUAL combat (because once I touched him to get the keys, that is assault) and would consider my co-worker's right to protect his belongings. NO ONE is saying all of that about this situation, and I am not. But throwing the keys in the woods does 3 things: makes sure it is difficult for them to separate during a heated argument, cripples a very expensive car that is not his, and says to him , 'there...I did that to you, what the fuck are YOU gonna do?" Now the answer SHOULD have been call separate cabs for them and get some help finding those keys or sue her for the cost of re-keying the Lambo. But it wasn't.
 
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Rampage said:
But there is a WIDE chasm between "walking on eggshells" and deciding not to cripple the use of a quarter-million dollar RENTED car. This is not throwing the keys to my Jetta in the woods, although I would be about as pissed as I could remember if someone did that. I could kick a man's ass for that, and though I would NEVER hit her, my wife would KNOW not to do that.
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it's a CAR! it's an OBJECT! If it was THAT serious, then Chris should have had the presence of mind to purchase whatever ADDITIONAL PROTECTION/INSURANCE he needed for such an expensive vehical. Accidents/Theft/"The unexpected" can happen to ANYONE and he could have simply called the police on Rhianna if she was damaging his property. They would have quickly dealt with HER just as they would anyone else.

Again...if you think beating someone over an OBJECT is somehow acceptable, then by all means..DO IT and see what happens to you.



I think we can have this discussion as adults without pretending that what she did was NOTHING. I am saying that while it was no justification for what he did, it was fucked up.
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she threw keys into the woods...YES it was childish and caused a problem but it doesnt STACK UP to what she got in return.

I did not say that women should walk on eggshells lest they get hit by a man. I DID say that it is unwise to do something as woman to a man that a man would hit another man for. That bar is actually rather high, not eggshells at all. Trust me, if Rihanna could turn back time and not toss those damn keys, she would. It ain't cool to be hurt and be RIGHT.
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the way you deal with OTHER MEN is not always the way you deal with a WOMAN. Like it or not...that is the way it is. It's not RIGHT and its not fair to think that a woman deserves the same "reaction" that you'd give a man over something like this...and again...NO ONE deserves to be attacked over a CAR. If you're going to behave like THAT then something is wrong with you too!
 
I would not behave in this way, let's start there. But we do not live life for just the way people should act. We also behave because of how people COULD act or react. I drive defensively because everyone is not as good a driver as I am. I carry very little cash because people are not always as honest as I am. And even I am careful about what I say and do because everyone will not remain calm and avoid violence. It is not fear for me, it is PRAGMATISM. I don't have time to be fighting.

Rihanna did not deserve this. But for women...for ANYONE, it is a cautionary tale. Some people are crazy as hell. My in-laws have a saying that applies here: be careful about who you get crazy with, because you might find someone crazier than you. I think before I act, and so should anyone. The response may be disproportionate.
 
I was wondering about this too, and I haven't said much.

I think the whole situation is bad, but I feel like Chris Brown should deserve a little more credit than he's getting. I know if I got mad and did something TOTALLY out of line that I should be punished for it, but I don't think the entire basis of my judgement of character should ONLY include that. I don't think he is a bad kid.. I think what he did was wrong and that he should be punished just like everyone else.

What I am more concerned is that I don't think the fight was just sparked by keys being thrown into the woods. There had to be SOME kind of fight on verbally anyway. I am not saying I condone the behavior at all whatsoever, but I think that nobody really knows what happened in that car between those two EXCEPT Chris and Rihanna and to argue about it makes no sense. We don't really know what happened. When the story first came out it was that Chris assaulted Rihanna with a deadly weapon, then it changed. I just don't feel like we will ever know enough to make enough of it..

I just feel bad because this is such a private matter and now the whole world has to deal with it. It's a bad situation.

I feel bad for BOTH of them.
 
Cars are an extension of men in some form or another. Everyone knows that especially women, that is why when a lot of women get angry at their man they tend to go after the car. So yes it's understandable why he would get angry, but it's still never a reason to hit a women. Many a man has had their tires slashed, windows broken, keys thrown, etc. and they just break up with their "crazy" girl.

However, as men who over analyze the "provocation", we forget a couple of things which kill the very argument that he was provoked:

Chris Brown can afford any car he wants
The car was rented and not his anyway.
 
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