Karma
Heart Attack
You may not know how much I've missed interacting w/ you all, or this place.
In late February thru early March, I suffered some serious setbacks in my personal life including the deaths of two very dear friends- 1 murdered, the other one committed suicide , strong storms on the job front & other personal difficulties. It got to the point where I was feeling overwhelmed & began to "check out" in some ways & before I knew it, I was suffering from a real bout of clinical despression.
Anyone who hasn't experienced it will never know how pervasive it is, how it creeps up over you w/out you knowing it even though you feel parts of yourself growing cold & shutting down, you feel yourself losing interest in things that give your life meaning...you feel yourself losing the will to continue forward...even physically MOVE. Depression doesn't just hurt...it CRIPPLES you.
Thankfully, I was able to get some help sooner rather than later & though it has been very difficult, I have been working through this & have made great progress in uprooting this depression from my mind, body & spirit. I learned that it wasnt just the things described above that made me vulnerable to a depressed state, but some other unresolved issues that I had tried to lock away a while ago that were haunting me. Well, though it hasn't been pretty (& that's why it's a wonderful thing that sessions between therapist & patient are PRIVATE & closed-door lol) I've been addressing this stuff & GETTING IT OUT OF ME @ long last.
I'm getting reconnected to the parts of my life that I let go of, I'm preparing to return to work & I'm feeling like MYSELF again...only w/out the "albatross" that i felt around my neck when the depression was first setting in.
I'd like to say THANK YOU VERY MUCH to those of you who called or texted me! I may not have been able to respond right away or even @ all in some cases...being that i was sleeping (way too much) or generally unavailable, but it meant alot to know that you thought of me during this difficult period.
Your care & concern is greatly appreciated! XOX
In late February thru early March, I suffered some serious setbacks in my personal life including the deaths of two very dear friends- 1 murdered, the other one committed suicide , strong storms on the job front & other personal difficulties. It got to the point where I was feeling overwhelmed & began to "check out" in some ways & before I knew it, I was suffering from a real bout of clinical despression.
Anyone who hasn't experienced it will never know how pervasive it is, how it creeps up over you w/out you knowing it even though you feel parts of yourself growing cold & shutting down, you feel yourself losing interest in things that give your life meaning...you feel yourself losing the will to continue forward...even physically MOVE. Depression doesn't just hurt...it CRIPPLES you.
Thankfully, I was able to get some help sooner rather than later & though it has been very difficult, I have been working through this & have made great progress in uprooting this depression from my mind, body & spirit. I learned that it wasnt just the things described above that made me vulnerable to a depressed state, but some other unresolved issues that I had tried to lock away a while ago that were haunting me. Well, though it hasn't been pretty (& that's why it's a wonderful thing that sessions between therapist & patient are PRIVATE & closed-door lol) I've been addressing this stuff & GETTING IT OUT OF ME @ long last.
I'm getting reconnected to the parts of my life that I let go of, I'm preparing to return to work & I'm feeling like MYSELF again...only w/out the "albatross" that i felt around my neck when the depression was first setting in.
I'd like to say THANK YOU VERY MUCH to those of you who called or texted me! I may not have been able to respond right away or even @ all in some cases...being that i was sleeping (way too much) or generally unavailable, but it meant alot to know that you thought of me during this difficult period.
Your care & concern is greatly appreciated! XOX
Unfortunately with the major time difference and my work schedule, I would have been calling or texting you at crazy hours lol. Otherwise I definitely would have, sorry about that. :/ But I was keeping track of everything that was going on via Brandon. 
