Captain Universe Is Dead!!!!!

[The Doctor]

(Screams No!!! for several hours until Universe explodes)

Okay well...Gabriel Vargas is dead not the Uni-Power...but still...Captain Universe has perished and we still don't know what the hell went down in the Microverse!!! Damn you DnA! A thousand curses upon your unholy names! I mean honestly...you are totally screwing up what Keith Giffen (or was it Griffen?) left behind! Oh...and what the hell is up with Ultron?! Ultron does not have the skill to command a race like the Phalanx and besides...isn't there a female one on Earth already?

Why did the leader of the Phalanx have to be him? Honestly, I was hoping it was someone cool like...The Magus (since their new personality befits his Church of Universal Truth rather than Ultron's crazy I want to destroy all humans attitude.) But of course Quesada would rather go with ratings and money than actual storytelling (I think I am beginning to have second thoughts on getting rid of Pete and MJ's Marriage, this new Peter Parker sucks.)

Agh! I just wish someone who is worthy to run the gauntlet of the that business would dethrone Joe Quesada already! Oh and Stan Lee does not really love what Joe has done with his characters, he is just being payed to say that and most likely has a gun pointing at him at all times when he appears on TV and in interviews so that he doesn't screw up Quesada's unravelment of the Marvel Universe.

It's just...so unfair that the Editor-In-Chief is both stupid and corrupt!! I mean I thought Civil War was bad! But now after having a while to think about it...Mary Jane and Peter's temporal induced break-up, the death of Gabriel Vargas, and The New Exiles not having Spider-Man 2099 or Blink on the team and having Claremont for a writer...has just brought bad to catastrophically worse.

Someone really needs to get the Celestials to kick Quesada's ass into the Gates of Oblivion. I am getting tired of every comic rewriting a History I have known and been comfortable with for many years. I am about to just go and rewrite history myself, that way Quesada won't be around to screw up our comics when my new self hits 19 again (of course to all of us, except for this version of me who will be in the past, nothing will have changed because it has always been and thus we will still be the same ages we currently are but live totally different, Quesada-free lives.)

In fact...I am gonna do that right now...

 

[willblade]

Now that folks, is a good, quality 'WTF Quesada!?' rant. I actually liked Civil War...it's the rest of this crap that's gone way too freaking far. >.<

 

[Karma]

Joe Quesada is an idiot, plain and simple, his DEGENERATIVE influence on the quality of Marvel has been easily seen now for a couple years.

 

[The Doctor]

Precisely...but can anyone do anything about it? No, because everyone is either to afraid or is just as corrupt as he is. What happened to the days when comic books were not just another money-making machine? Where are the whisimical tales of a world where The Fantastic Four, Thor, Iron Man and an Alternate Universes Gladiator must stop The Dreaming Celestial from making Galactus gobble up the entire Universe? Where are the stories of Thor, Sif and the Warriors Three as the fight Loki in the very heart of Asgard itself? Where are the legends of a man who became frozen towards the end of a great war and awoke to find himself in a world he no longer knew but nevertheless found he was still needed?

Why are we now be forced to live in a world where Spider-Man and Mary Jane actually made a deal with Mephisto to alter a very important stitch of time (yes, I have rethought my opinion on the Spidey/MJ thing, I miss their married life), a world where Iron Man became as tyranical and fanatical as Dr. Doom, a world without...Captain America, Bill Foster, Gabriel Vargas, Wanda Maximoff and so many others. I believe we are seeing the truly final days of the old Marvel Universe.

The Dreaming Celestial now stands in the light of this world once more in his golden armor awaiting for the abominations created by his treacherous brethren to come for him. When they do he will judge Humanity worthy of life and should the people of that Universe fail, which they may already have, then Joe Quesada will give the order and the old Marvel Universe will be axed! Giving rise to a worthless, dead, terribly written "mega-event" that will promise to...once again...change the Marvel Universe as we know it.

I had enough with the changes that move the world foreward or those that move us backward but really just move us foreward in a newer, even worse way...it's time to break the timeline apart and rewind the clock all the way back to the days just before "Spider-Man: The Clone Saga" was created. From there...perhaps all the damage that was made can be undone and with someone new at the helm maybe they can get it right this time!!

I don't want to live in a world where every Hero is forced by Government Law to reveal their identities to the world and thus put at risk everything they took up a secret identity to protect. I don't want Captain America to be dead or Iron Man to be a monster or Spider-Man and Mary Jane not to be married or Ultron to rule over the Phalanx! But to undo so much history...would take a lot, it's not as simple as what Mephisto did with Peter and Mary Jane's marriage, the whole of History would take something larger, far more catastrophic to reverse the changes that have been done!

Of course we don't need a Meta-Series with a billion tie-in's to tell us what is going to happen...a nice, 48-page One-Shot will do fine. Maybe have Makkari plead his creator, The Dreaming Celestial, to reverse the torture wrought upon Marvel Earth and then choose to serve him for Time Immemorial as payment or have someone at The Time Variance Authority screw up on a delicate precedure thus causing mainstream history to reset. Anything to get rid of the here and now.

Because anywhere else is better than here and now. I know you all are thinking of something similar...be it to a greater or lesser extent.