BAD dancers

Harbinger

Keeper of Time
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We've talked about how cool and fun it is to dance. We've talked about dance divas, dance tracks and the like....but what about the people who are just BAD at dancing? :D

We all know a few artists who really have made half assed, or down right LAUGHABLE attempts to dance in their videos...and noticeably NEVER have any immpressive choreography featured in their live performances...unless you count walking back and forth across the stage or having 100 dancers BEHIND you to give the illusion that you can dance LOL!

so i'll begin the list:

WHITNEY HOUSTON - yes, the woman could sing like few others could..but she damn sure can't dance...and how ironic considering one of her classic tracks- "I wanna dance with somebody"

Mariah Carey- she cant dance...but she can sure WALK in those stillettos.

Jessica Simpson- this girl thinks that putting 25 dancers behind her in a video and waving her arms a little bit will make her look like she can dance. SORRY it doesnt work LOL.

Crystal Waters- she can barely sing...let alone dance....and yet she's churned out a few club bumpers in her time...but damn does she look stupid in her videos trying to dance LOL!

50 Cent- unless you count standing there, swaying from side to side with "gangsta swagger" as a dance move...then HE seems to be rhythmically challegend too.


who else can we add?
 
i would honestly say there are very few really good dancers in music entertainment. It would almost be easier to name THEM. In fact, some of the new people are simply following choreographer instructions. Chris Brown, Omarion, and J. Timberlake can really dance.
 
Omg, the WORST dancer around is this blonde streetwalker with these horrible horrible black roots...I think her name is Farrah....Farrah Fishypuss. :p :D
 
Persephone, you putrid platypuss polyp from hell, could you try staying ON TOPIC? :rolleyes:

and Rampage? there are a few VERY good dancers in the music industry, some that come to mind for me:

Toni Basil - MORE than just her "Mickey video" Toni has shown Janet, Madonna, and a few others how its done and is one of the most legendary dance artists around. She still choreographs the Academy Award numbers to this day and is one of the contributing authors on a ground breaking documentary called "Evolution of Street Dance"

Debbie Allen- who personifies the "Tripple threat", this woman is a goddess.

Madonna - who not only went to college on a dance scholarship but also studied under Pearl Lang, a desciple of Martha Graham [who is widely considered to be the most important figure in "modern dance" history in America from the 20th century] AND M was a member of the Allen Ailey dance company.

Janet- granted without Tina Landon and Paula Abdul, Janet would not be known for her moves....but she had a NATURAL ability to pick up the choreography


back back to BAD dancers: c'mon now...we've all seen some people who couldnt even handle SIMPLE steps and routines in their videos.

Mandy Moore is another one (watch her "Candy" video LOL)

Christina Aguilera's dancing is marginal....even the choreography she does ..it seems that most times its hard for her to sing AND dance at the same time.
 
:D Fiiiiiiiiiiine.

Hilary Duff is a pretty bad dancer...I remember watching her performance on So You Think You Can Dance (LOL ironic huh?) and she wasn't very good. Watch her video, Stranger, and you'll see.

Avril Lavigne and her sudden 'transformation' has gotten her dancing now too....and she sucks. The microphone stand is better than her. Look at her new video, Hot. It's horrible lol.
 
I might be on my own here but I really have always thought Rihanna was a terrible dancer. You'll notice they try to mask it in her latest videos with cutting camera angles but in stuff like "SOS" she just seems very uncomfortable doing it. Likewise Beyonce I think is awful. Moving your chest in and out at a high rate is not dancing. Seeing the "Beautiful Liar" video where she tries to keep up with Shakira -- who is very good at her own style of dancing -- is just cringe worthy.

Personally, recent VMA performance aside, I always thought Britney was a great dancer. Looking at her VMA with Madonna and Christina you can really see she shows up the latter in terms of movement.
 
I have to agree with you about Beyonce. I cannot STAND the way she dances....booty popping is not dancing. I swear, I think she is the most overrated singer/performer. (although I did love Destiny's Child).
 
I disagree, booty poppin' is a talent not many possess ( God Bless Beyonce's ass!) and it IS dance, but Beyonce is not a great dancer. She does move well, which I think puts her beyond some of these on this list.

I think Christina tries to maximize what she knows she lacks by having good choreographed movement, but not really dance. I have typically been less than impressed with Britney. I happen to think she simply follows direction well.
 
oh please. you just like it because it titillates you LOL.

I dont think "booty popping" is that big a deal..if you've seen one (possibly digitally enhanced) ass..you've seen em all. she wouldnt last five minutes against Janet or Madonna step for step and i dont recall EITHER of those two relying on "booty popping" to get attention lol :p "big asses" (and the subsequent fascination with booty popping) wouldnt be "in style" if not for Sir Mix Alot's anthem from the early 90's. at least it seems that way to me.

speaking of asses...anyone remember that god awful "ass smacking" dance move Mariah did in the Heartbreaker video where she fought herself? LOL :haha:
 
To be honest, I can't name anyone recent who could last 5 minutes with Janet or Madonna, LOL. And the booty-poppin is as good as anyone else is doing, especially since Britney is Queen boozer now...

in fact, only guys in music seem to really care about dancing now...
 
I have to say Britney Spears is a horrible dancer! At least right now. I saw her Gimmie Gimmie video and its nothing but T & A, in my opinion. Not much for dancing really.

Beyonce really isn't bad but Britney is as of right now. Maybe in the past Britney might have been good but she's really bad lol.
 
Omg, the WORST dancer around is this blonde streetwalker with these horrible horrible black roots...I think her name is Farrah....Farrah Fishypuss. :p :D

MeeeeeeOW!

Spellbinder said:
Persephone, you putrid platypuss polyp from hell, could you try staying ON TOPIC? :rolleyes:

MeeeeeeOW again!


I don't watch music videos anymore, but after that Pepsi commercial, I thought Shakira was a good foot shaker and no one's mentioned her so far.

Bad ones.............. I've read some good sounding calls here so far but can't say which are in my view.
 
FARRAH! I just keep picturing Whitney Houston trying to dance in her "I Wanna Dance With Somebody" with that big ass crimped orange hair. It reminds me of Britney's HIGH Dance Performance on the VMAS in 2007 haha!

Please Watch it.. she like dances for intervals of 3 seconds and then she just goes back to singing. Watch it HERE and laugh!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n52CzPvwPQ0
 
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